To Celebrate Lily Turning Nine Months Old...

And then there was the day we took Lily to the ER and she got herself some surgery accompanied by some really awesome pain medications.

It all started a couple of weeks ago when the kids and I got sick with nasty colds. Lily developed what looked like a swollen gland. The area right under her jaw on her right side was swollen and red and hot. We took her to the doctor. Doctor #1 said it was probably just viral. Then she said it could be mumps so we got some blood work done. Then we switched doctors because we thought Doctor #1 was insane. Doctor #2 said it was an infection and prescribed a 10-day course of antibiotics. Lily got diarrhea because of said antibiotics. It was delightful.

After a few days her swollen gland started looking less and less like a swollen gland and more and more like a really swollen bug bite. It got hard and red and purple. We were worried. We took her back to Doctor #2 who told us to go the ER. Cue the tears and some minor hysteria. Tommy asked me, "Mom, why does your voice sound funny?" In my most chipper voice I told him it was because I was crying. Then he said, "It's ok, Mom, it happens. Are you going to be happy again?" Bless that boy's heart.

We have been blessed by amazing friends who have dropped everything to watch Tommy while we took Lily to the hospital. We have been blessed by amazing friends and family across the country who have prayed for our sweet baby.

We got to the ER at about 4:00 on Monday. They did an ultrasound and determined that the abscess was 2 cm across and 1 cm deep. Pretty big for a little baby neck. We watched Monday night football (Green Bay vs. Seahawks) and several snippets of various Disney movies. Lily was a trooper and played games and laughed even after we had been in the hospital for hours. It was cold and we had to sit around a lot. Lily couldn't eat because they thought she might need immediate surgery. Here we are hanging out in the ER when everyone was still happy.

By about 10:00 they decided to admit us to the hospital. They put an IV in Lily's arm, which I'm pretty sure is the most awful experience any of us have had to endure. They stuck both her hands and one foot looking for a vein. She's so chubby they had a really hard time finding one. After at least 20 or 30 minutes they finally found one in her arm. She screamed until she was hoarse. I tried to stay strong and not cry as I held her. Ben held me in return. They had to put her arm in a splint and tape it from her wrist to her shoulder so she wouldn't bend her arm. Cue more tears.

After this they started her on some antibiotics through the IV. I lay down with her and sang primary songs until she fell into a restless sleep, interrupted by hiccoughs from crying so much. Ben went home to get Tommy and try to sleep a bit. Lily and I were finally ushered into our room at the hospital around midnight.

We both slept lightly until 5:15 am when they started Lily on more antibiotics. She woke up screaming and didn't stop until nearly 7:00. I just held her and tried to stay calm and suppress my tears in spite of myself. The surgeon and the anesthesiologist came and talked to us. They gave Lily a drug called Versa that was a wonderdrug. Within one minute she calmed down completely, looked at me through half-closed eyes, and smiled. She was totally stoned as she let her head flop around and giggled. I laughed. It felt really good to laugh and to see Lily smile again.

All ready for surgery. You can see the infected site on the right side of her chin.

The surgery was very short. They apparently drained her lymph node of a truckload of puss. Then they looked at it under a microscope. Doesn't it sound fun to be a doctor? They still aren't sure what caused the infection, or what bacterial strain it even is. Hopefully we'll know in the next day or so.

Taking a long snooze this afternoon.  Pain meds = amazing.

Ben came bearing gifts of deodorant, socks, and fruit. It took Lily 30 minutes or so to wake up. Then she ate for over and hour. Then she slept. The rest of the day, that's how it's been: eating or sleeping. I feel like I have a newborn again.

We are hoping to go home tomorrow. It has kind of been nice to step out of my busy life and just hold my baby all day, but I'm ready to go home. Lily is ready to go home. I miss Tommy. I miss my own bed. I'm still wearing the same outfit I wore yesterday and slept in. I miss my shower. I'm sure everyone else wishes I would shower, or at least put on the deodorant Ben brought me.

Being in the hospital with my baby conjures up a whole host of mixed emotions and paradoxes. I am saddened beyond belief to see her in pain, but I know she has to be poked and prodded a bit in order to get better. I hate being interrupted every 30 minutes by somebody coming into our room to check on Lily, but I am grateful to be surrounded by capable nurses and doctors who are working hard to help her heal. I hate being in the hospital, yet I am grateful for the wonders of technology and medicine that make a potentially life-threatening infection something routine and simple. My feet are cold, yet my arms are warm from snuggling my little girl. I am so tired, but I feel energized from taking a break from my busy schedule. I miss my boy, but I am grateful for the hours I have to focus completely on my girl. I miss snuggling with Ben, yet I love him more deeply as I watch him tenderly care for our children. It's so emotional. I kind of feel like I'm a new mom again in the maternity ward, except I can walk and pee by myself.

Thank you so much to those of you who have watched Tommy or brought in meals. Thank you for the text messages, the phone calls, and the Facebook messages wishing us well and offering your services. Thank you for the prayers and for the love you send. We feel it and it is so humbling. Cue more tears.

This evening she felt well enough to play with toys for a few minutes before going to bed. Her gown doesn't stay on very well.

The Most Important Thing I've Learned As A Mom

What are the most important things you have learned as a mom? For most of you it's probably something along the lines of "I didn't know I could love somebody this much" or "I never knew I could enjoy waking up repeatedly with my children". You are good people. For me? The lesson I am most proud of myself for learning is that messes can be cleaned up. That's the whole thing. Hands can be washed. Clothes can be burned. New sheets can be bought. Floors can be scrubbed. It's all good.

We went to McDonald's last week yesterday a couple of weeks ago to get Tommy a "brown ice cream cone" because I am not above bribing my child. It was one of those soft serve ice creams dipped in the chocolate sauce that hardens. We both got one and they were delicious. And messy. And they started dripping as soon as the McDonald's guy handed them to us. And they kept dripping and pretty soon Tommy had ice cream flowing down his arm, off his elbow, and onto his lap. Did I mention they were messy? And that we used at least 87 napkins to clean up? I was busting up laughing while I watched Tommy try to eat this thing. He literally had ice cream all over his face, both hands and arms, his chest, and his lap. You have been duly warned. If you need to bribe your child to do something like not pee in their bed maybe you should choose a treat that's not so sticky.

"It's a good thing there's a bathroom!" - Tommy

A couple of weeks ago we had some really beautiful weather. It was cloudy and rainy for a few days, so we took advantage of the cooler mornings and evenings to go to the park a few times. I don't know when it has ever been cool enough to walk to the park in August in Phoenix, but there you go. I don't know when it has ever been cool enough to walk to the mailbox in August in Phoenix.

Anyway, we went to the park and the field that is usually grassy had turned into a small lake. Tommy wanted to step in it and I thought that would be a splendid idea. Little boys are supposed to splash in rain puddles, right? Well, what I didn't think about was that we live in Arizona and the grass is constantly infested with biting ants (all ants here bite). So I sent my little boy into the bug-infested water and even after he looked back at me and said his legs hurt, I urged him on and cheered and clapped at his boyishness. Once he started crying I stopped clapping and realized that he was being eaten alive from the feet up. So then my mama bear instincts kicked in and I whisked him out of the water and tore off his shoes and socks and smashed all the ants. All of them. Then we were left with a little dilemma. Lily was in the stroller and Tommy was barefoot and his shoes were still crawling with ants. I had no choice but to squish both kids into the stroller and you know what? It worked great! They loved being squished together. Aren't they cute?

Sometimes when Lily wakes up and I am in the middle of something I send Tommy into her room to keep her company until I can come. The other day I walked into her room to find that Tommy had climbed into her crib and promptly stole one of her binkies. He said they were playing garbage truck and that Lily was driving.

A couple of weeks ago Tommy woke up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 4:45am. I decided that since we were all tired we would trek over to the zoo where we could walk several miles and burn off all our excess energy. The morning was cool enough that it was actually pretty enjoyable. It rained a bit while we were there and just when the sun came out we played at the splash pad inside the zoo. Bonus. Tommy fell asleep on the way home, which was my conniving plan all along. Even though he fell and skinned his knees at the zoo and then insisted on being carried everywhere after we got home because his "blood hurt" we had a great time. We love our Tiny Tom. If you ask him what is his favorite thing at the zoo he will respond 100% of the time "the tractors". I'm glad he was willing to share them with his little sister.

Floating Baby Collar?

I was browsing Amazon today looking for some swimming stuff for my kids and was amazed to find this. I can just imagine what the engineers were thinking: "I know, babies can't swim on their own so let's design this collar made of plastic and attach it to their necks! They'll swim in no time, if they don't get strangled or suffocate first!" Seriously? I'll just stick to life jackets and kickboards, thank you very much.